What to say?

My fiancee and I are a young couple and are getting married next year and everyone I tell tells me that I am too young to get married and it really is making me mad. They are like trying to control my life and telling me that I can't do it at such a young age. Most of the people that are telling me this is not even my family AT ALL, like for instance i went to my dentist for a cleaning and was trying to talk me out of it and pressuring me into going to a certain college and i just wanted to tell her off so bad. What should I tell people that are doing this to me? Also, I still haven't told my real dad that I am engaged and am afraid how he going to react to it. I haven't seen him for the past 3 years and he is still very overly protective. Should both of us tell him at the same time or should I do it on my own. He lives too far away to go and see hime in person so...yeah. Any suggestions?

What to say?
well, since you did not list your age, i am just going to assume you are 18 and just graduated. Some people do that, get married right out of high school and are just fine. Others aren't. Money is going to be a bigger problem in your relationship though and you will have to learn to be an adult with a person who is learning too. it can be done, but will be rough
Reply:your dad will know sooner or later its best you tell him early the longer you shake the bottle the stronger the pop.
Reply:Um, if you're over 18, you're legally not too young to get married....





However, if you're "worried" about telling your dad, if you're worried about people controlling your life, if what your dentist thinks matters so much to you, then I've got 1 thing to say to you...





You're too young to get married.
Reply:Well if you, a woman, has a fiancee that means you are marrying a woman. No wonder everyone is upset.


IF however, you are marrying your fiance, who is a male, then why is everyone who knows you so concerned? They must not see a maturity in you yet. Why are YOU in a rush to get married? Are you wanting out of the house you live in?


If this is the one and only man for you, then the love will endure while you both go to college and get skills for jobs that will support you both and your children.





Regarding your father -- it is supposed to be the man who asks your father for your hand in marriage...so he should be calling your Dad.





Wait, it won't hurt a bit.
Reply:You know what it is - marriage isn't about having a boyfriend anymore - it's an economical institution that binds you legally to be responsible for each other in a way that forces you to deal with seeing each other day in day out forever until you get old and die, people don't think about that reality before saying yes - it's like are you guys willing to go to hell for each other and for how long, will you give up on each other or remember to bring out each other's best??? It's hard to know, people grow in different directions and to think long term is difficult too.





About telling your dad, it would mean a lot to him to know, but you do what is comfortable for you and do that one by yourself.
Reply:They aren't trying to control your life, they are looking out for your best interest. Unfortunately 50% of married couples end up divorced and that is horrible for they couple and it's family.
Reply:It's kinda funny: You get mad at being called "too young to get married", then worry about getting in trouble from you dad about it.





Look, they're entitled to their opinion. But it's kind of rude on their part. I'd just smile and change the subject. Getting all hot and bothered about it will not make you appear at all mature, and you'd just be proving their point.





As far as your dad goes, sooner is better than later, especially if he is paying for it. There is a tradition that the groom approaches the bride's parents for their blessing. But do what feels best. A phone call from you might just be your best course of action.





I really wish you all the best for your wedding!
Reply:You should watch "Engaged and Underage" on MTV. And maybe have a longer engagement. I'm 25, as well as my boyfriend, and we're not engaged yet, but I'm still concerned about what our money situation will be when we do tie the knot. We're both students and don't exactly make a lot of money. I know that when my friend got married (she's 23 and he's 31) her parents cut her off financially, except for her car, which is owned by her family company. You need to think about things like where you'll live, when to have kids, what to do about things like cars and car insurance, your future careers, and if school is in your future. It usually doesn't work that two people can get married and go to school at the same time. I wish you the best!!!