I can't tell if my family has any money?

My mom is a single parent. my twin sister and i both go to expensive colleges in boston, between us its probably 40,000 a year. anyways. I don't really know how much my mom makes, she was a practicing dentist but now she works for NYS gov't. I feel bad because I could have just gone to a public school but she insisted I go where i really wanted. I have felt really bad about it since I think its tough for her.





she just brought a new car. its a trailblazer (who knows why a mom living alone needs that). nothing was really wrong with her old car so i felt good, because i figured that must mean she is doing alright





anyways i am home for spring break/my birthday. i heard her on the phone with my aunt this morning talking and sounding alittle depressed about something to do with money. and she didn't give me a birthday present, and said she would put some money in my account next week. i don't care about that. but thats not like her; I feel like she just didn't have the money!

I can't tell if my family has any money?
Well a guy your age should ask mom for lunch or coffee--then after you get her to relax, simply ask how she is doing and if everything is alright--don't ask about money straight out--sounds horrible--start slow and tell her you appreciate all you have and the education opportunities---you just want to know if she is alright and not overburdened---remember to show the woman respect and courtesy when you speak to her---she will be surprised by the maturity you show--but she may not admit anything this time---don't you have even a little job?? You better get one---no excuses accepted. And when you do graduate---better offer money to mom once in a while---have some class.


Have these talks often--they do get easier in time. Good luck
Reply:...... at least you have a heart.
Reply:I think its up to your mother to handle it and worry about it, so far it would seem she's done ok. On the other side, she may have over stretched herself. If she needs help I'm sure she'll seek it, but if she chooses not to tell you anything, you must respect that.
Reply:When you get you education and a great job, then please shower your mother with gifts and attention!





It sounds like she is going beyond her means to give you the best. I know many people that do this, and they are miserable so that their kids do not have to pay for their own education - you are very lucky - but it is very sad for your mother.





Chances are she is swamped in debt at this point. Appreciate what she is doing, even though it is stupid on her part - because she deserves to be happy too!
Reply:Are you upset that your Mom got a new car and you didn't get a birthday present? Who is paying for your education? If your Mom wanted you to know how much she makes she will tell you, if not, then it's none of your business.
Reply:Yea your mom wants the best for you... Let her take care of it on her own for now .. do well in school and repay the favor later in life... and if you think shes really in a tight money situation .. maybe try not to ask for too much else right now.. wait until shes a little better off financially... Its nice that your concerned thou...
Reply:Hey Mike,


It's very honorable that you're concerned about your mom....but as a single mom myself, I know firsthand myself that I sacrificed and will continue to sacrifice for both my children.......your mom sounds like a well educated, intelligent woman who cares deeply for both you and your sister.....


Just continue to show her the love and respect I believe you have for her....along with finishing out school %26amp; I guarantee you that your mom will get her money back tenfold (not to mention a few extra little perks that money can't buy!)


Good Luck!


Your mom is lucky to have such a caring young man...she certainly has done a great job with you!
Reply:I think you should talk to her about it. It couldn't hurt. Sometimes grown adults get in over their in debt, and you could help her by talking about it, or at least have a better understanding of what her situation is. If she is having a hard time, than you and your siblings can work together with her to work it out. Communication is the key.
Reply:The best thing you can do now mate is only to focus on your studies. Your goal in life. Your future. Your mum surely wants to see you, and be proud of you. She is definitely working very hard now for a single mother supporting school fees of up to 40K. Trust me.. she doesn't tell you anything to not let you worry about her condition. 3 choices mate :





1 ) Get a part-time job to ease her pain by paying your own school fees. A college student should be able to do that although this option is not recommended.





2 ) Do your best and focus 100% in your goal, in your future, in your studies. Achieve that success in life and pay her back not twice fold but a hundred times more. However, all a mother wants is your love and your acknowledgment and your care when she's old. So, remember to do so to repay her.





3 ) Get a scholarship.





Whatever choices your make, always remember God is up there watching our every step and blessing us in every way. Don't ever forget that.





Anyway, Good luck and have fun in your life ( at least try to ).
Reply:She shouldn't have gotten the car then. I think you are right about she not having the money. Seriously consider transfering.
Reply:It's not your responsibility to worry, or feel guilty about your mothers finances. People that make 6 figure salaries, can have cash flow problems too. She earns her money, it's hers to do with as she wants. She obviously wants to spend her money on you and your sisters education. Don't look a gift horse in the mouth.